You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
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