i permit you to call me
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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