I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
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the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
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