I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
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