So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
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Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
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