We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
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he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
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My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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