guys are not supposed to queef...right?
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
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