Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
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I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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