Whod you bang
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I'm getting married
To pizza
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
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