dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
True college students do jello shots in the library
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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