It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize