I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
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