What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
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i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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