Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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