his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize