I'm pants shitting drunk right now
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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