two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Randomize
