Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
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