I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
You were trust falling into bushes
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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