we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
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it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
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Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
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