I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
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