I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
wow bdsm is so cute
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