She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
this will be a night to untag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
you inspire me to be a worse person
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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