He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize