yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Randomize