Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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