I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize