Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Randomize