the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
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Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
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He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
All I want is dick and wine.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
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