Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Randomize