We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Randomize
