like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
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She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
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The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
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