If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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