Define "chronic" masturbator.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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