There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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