That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Never underestimate the power of titties
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