Moan for me like Helen Keller
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize