omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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