I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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