you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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