At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize