Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Randomize