I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Randomize