We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Randomize