Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Randomize