i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize