fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I booty called her while she was in labor.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Randomize