let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
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