I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize