can we get nightvision for the apartment?
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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